We had some great weather today. It was pouring rain and the thunder was so loud I thought I would use the opportunity to steal a car because I figured the owner would never suspect their car alarm would legitimately be going off. I do need a new car but I made the moderately-wiser-but-unfortunately-not-as-awesome-decision and opted for a walk.
Funny thing about walks in Wilmington during thunder storms. You learn very quickly that this city was probably built by someone who grew up making sandcastles. They always look neat… until a wave comes. Then the combination of crappy planning and uneven roads leads to the slow erosion of the city of sand… and underwater we go!
Then again, the sandcastle either goes underwater or it gets crushed by some giant ass 5 year old who has no respect for your work of art. Were some baby giant to stomp on Wilmington, we’d nuke that kids ass. I figure the same drop-kick mentality should then be able to be cross applied to sandcastle crushers. I’ve heard sand castle crushing doesn’t hold up well in a court of law when claiming provocation from a 5 year old as defense to assault, however. Something about a reasonable person.
Who wants to be reasonable?
That’s the beauty of being a kid, really. You can be entirely unreasonable. For example, I always used to wonder what the hell went through a kids mind when they stomp on my sandcastle. Then I realized that’s just it. Their “don’t fuck with people” sensor is broken at that age, and their youth gives them protection. I think exactly like that kid who smashes my sandcastle. Some guy on a bike rides by and I want to slam a stick in his spokes. Don’t pretend you don’t imagine doing the same thing. Of course, I don’t actually slam a stick in his spokes, but only because I’ve got that sensor in place. A 5 year old however…
And that’s where the word vicarious comes from.
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